In the past one week, the most trending news both on the traditional and social media in Nigeria, has been the death of a popular gospel singer, Mrs. Osinachi Nwachukwu, who was allegedly beaten to death in Abuja by her husband, Pastor Peter Nwachukwu.
Since the occurrence, virtually everyone on social media has become a professional marriage counselor. There has been much ado about domestic violence.
While some were objective in their commentaries, others were just throwing stones, casting aspersions and pontificating on why Osinachi was so blinded by love to ignore probable red flags that may have been dangling in that relationship over the years.
Places of worship, where the parties involved are associated with, were not spared the hot pummels of castigation. In fact, pundits have even dragged God, the creator and author of marriage, onto the judgment seat of social commentators, to defend Himself and explain the reason He thought it necessary that people should marry.
The even asked God to offer explanation why He kept quiet and watched Peter beat and kick Osinachi to death, especially as the later was said to be a praise and worship leader at church. Indeed, they were at odds to understand why God did not rain fire and brimstone on Peter or unleash a legion of His angels to make minced meat of the miscreant.
Our extreme commentators, in their “righteous” fury have even forgotten that the same all-knowing God had looked on while the Jewish proselytes stoned Deacon Stephen to death. They did not remember that our great Jehovah was still Jehovah when all the Apostles of Christ were subjected to the most excruciating torture in human history. In fact, it was just one out of the 12 apostles, John the Beloved, that died naturally at old age. The rest 11 were brutally and inhumanly executed. God will always be God no matter what man does or goes through.
Domestic violence originated in the human race since the day Esau, the first son of the first human family on earth, killed his brother, just out of petty jealousy. We also found instances of domestic violence in the family of King David when Amnon, the first son of the king, raped his half sister, Tamar; Absalom killed Amnon to revenge the humiliation of his sister, Tamar; Absalom chased his father away from the throne and slept with his father’s concubines in full watchful glare of all Israel; Solomon, as he ascended the throne as new king of Israel registered as one of his earliest achievements, the killing of his elder half brother, Adonijah, in dispute over who should inherit the young virgin concubine their father left behind, after his death. All these were instances of domestic violence.
However, domestic violence took a different dimension when it became an expression of disagreement between spouses. In most homes, it has become the language through which dissension is expressed.
Domestic violence manifests in diverse forms: Nagging, isolation, attention withdrawal and denial, starvation in food and sex, denying of necessary welfare, rape, stalking and, of course, beating and other forms of physical violence (To be continued in part two).